I am trying my hands on something which i have not touched so far, "Short-Stories" that was a hell of a job to write and READ as well...
I request you to read and to cast your honest feedback(if it is negative, please don't spoil my image in front of girls, i will appreciate if you scold me in private).
THE END of the PREAMBLE. here i go with my debut....
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5.00 A.M
5.05 A.M
5.10 A.M
5.15 A.M
5.30 A.M
These are my ALARM timings, obviously one alarm will not solve it purpose...
"Engineering service examination, you must start at time", i told myself before going to bed...
5.00 AM alarm shouted and died and so his successor ALARM-I and so his generations,
The great ALARM-II, III and IV.
Finally Sir Great Alarm-V took a sweet revenge for his forefathers.
"5:30 AM"
"Where i am i ? "
Oh yeah, What the FUN ?
"It's 5;30 AM"
"You can't reach the exam center on time", "Go get brushed and finish your daily works"
I can't tolerate such words, especially when i say these to myself.
It would be nice if i had my mom here by this twilight, smell of a STRONG degree coffee...
Got my brush, applied the paste... "Screwed my teeth"
WHAT THE FUN, My toothpaste taste sucks...
Damn it, "It's not tooth paste but a shaving cream"
Woak Woak Woak.....
What a perfect day to begin?
I ditched all my morning duties and with a empty BURNING stomach, i was so busy in selecting a shirt and pant.
"Deepak, today there will not be much of chicks, then why care about dressing?"
"It's engineering exam and that will be dominated by Mechanical and Civil, there will be guys and TOMBOYS but no girls :("
Karthik interrupted, " you black hole, forgot that ? Electronics and communication engineering, electrical engineering branches will be there too, there can be few girls, so Dress properly"
Sometimes i love Karthik, "He will look everything in a better way than his counter part."
At last, i narrowed down to an orange striped shirt and a black trouser.
locked the doors and checked it once, "Phew yes they are locked"
Wait, "Hall ticket?"
I love to breath the morning breeze, less polluted and virgin breeze, that serene roads...
Will be a pleasure to walk and i walked, walked, walked till i reach my BUS STOP...
One of the best thing that i like in Chennai, "MTC buses, i love them for no reason(obviously only when they are deserted)"
I boarded a half empty bus, my destination is Tambaram train station...
Unlike the rest of Tamil Nadu, Chennai conductors are so special, they will not move their own seat a bit from their conductor seat, perfect examples for Fevicol advertisement.
I have to walk to the end for getting a ticket from him, while the oldies may get a permanent ticket to meet MR.Yamraj in the war of walking to them for a silly ticket.
"One Tambaram station"
"Where???"
"One tambaram station anna"
"Oh Tambaram dation ah? ask it clearly..."
"Oh Yea, one DATION"
If you are not from Chennai, you will not understand this conversation exactly...
Station-Dation
Ticket- dicket
Fast- Past and so on...
I love that TAMIL(no English) and that's our identity :)
My travel will take up to 30 minutes, i can enjoy by sight seeing and also SIGHT seeing, but this bus is full of MILK VENDOR UNCLES, FLOWER SELLING AUNTS and WATCHMEN RETURNING HOME...
It is certainly tough to identify rain drops from ocean, but i can and that's how i saw HER..
You can take her and place her in front of any politician convoy, Her HAIR far better(darker) than any BLACK flag, perhaps Hawkings can use them for black holes research.
If you say above turn, you can see TWO moons if that was on a full moon day and for sure you can see a moon if that was a NO moon day :P
Cosmic connections, they can be...
She was on a orange churidhar...
For free, i scanned her...
1) Kohl eyes( i love them)
2) Tiny nose stud on a long running nose.
3) She had a same fast track watch.
4) Sandals without heels(simplicity).
5) She had no shining jewels than her controlled smile.
All that i wished, "She must be going for the same destination" "dation ticket"
Our Conductor stepped out now...
They will rarely do this but only for girls(feminists please take a note)
She took the seat which was diagonally opposite to me.( i'm a mathematician, yah)
I was just Listening... Listening....
"One Camp road" - very old feeble voice said...
What the fun?? i swiftly rotated my head and zoomed my eyes, searched for the TARGET.
It was a grandma, relaxed for two reasons...
I liked the way she passed the tickets to that very old grandma.
That's the real beauty...
Lub dub lub dub moments came as she prolonged her bangle less yet glittering hand....
"Where.." that rude idiot asked without a respect :P
And with her vanilla voice she said...
"Hi all, Wait for Buses of Chennai county Part 2 "
-READ PART 2
Ahem!!! :D Great start! :D Post the next one soon :) BTW your story?? :P
ReplyDelete@Archana Nagarajan LOL :P Thanks for the read.. PLEASE wait till the sequel gets over.. NOT MORE THAN 3 :P
ReplyDeleteSo when is the next part coming up?
ReplyDelete@ಅಶ್ವಿನಿ/ Ashwini soon :) :)
ReplyDeletefunny and entertaining..post part 2 soon :)
ReplyDelete@Deepz thanks for the read :) will post asap :) plz do read that as well
ReplyDeleteaaahh.. super... naratting is such a wonderful thing. u did that. waiting for the continuation...tambaram Dation plz...
ReplyDelete@சேகர்Nandri nanba :)
ReplyDeleteGood attempt Deepak :) Post the sequel soon :)
ReplyDeleteExcellent narration Deepak !!!
ReplyDelete@jaish_vats Thank you ji :) will post asap
ReplyDelete@rajkumar.rr thank you sir !
ReplyDeleteNice and entertaining! Will wait for the next part :)
ReplyDelete@Abhinav Thanks Abhinav....
ReplyDeleteVery interesting and entertaining..:-)..Great effort Deepak..:-)Waiting for the next part..:-)
ReplyDelete@A Homemaker's Utopia thanks a ton ji :) will post asap
ReplyDeleteDee in Chennai engelesh i say sooper macchi!!! Humorous and an interesting post and am looking forward to the part 2.
ReplyDelete@Engramthank you sire :)
ReplyDeleteAwesome. Daily morning alarm 1, 2,3.. I hope, most students do the same every morning. your narration.. Chance less. All the best.
ReplyDelete"andhap ponnu kandippaa okay sollum propose panninaa.." :P :)
Eagerly waiting to laugh louder with the next part! :)
Interesting. Not certain that long form fiction in this style would be able to sustain my interest, but for shorter pieces like this, perhaps it is ok. May be I am just old fashioned and cannot appreciate change. Keep it up, Deepak. Chetan Bhagat has competition.
ReplyDelete@Kanmani haha thanks for your sweet comment :) sure i will post asap :)
ReplyDelete@Subhorup DasguptaEverytime i see your comment, i ll get the feel of doing some good work :)
ReplyDeletethanks for appreciations SUBH sire :)
Chetan ??
haha will try my best :)
Super Machi. :D
ReplyDeleteAnd btw she had a long "running nose"? Cheeeee. :D
@Akshay Kumar G LOL :) thanks akshay...
ReplyDeleteshe had a long nose :P not running nose...
noooooooo u cannot end here..when is d nxt part coming......plzzzzzzzzzzzzz,,,,,, deepak plz post the girls photo nxt tym :D :P :), we r awaiting for the nxt write up :)
ReplyDelete@saikat mbka ghosh here comes my favorite reader :)
ReplyDeleteThanks saikat :) will come soon...
Pic of her ???
If Deepak is writing, then of course there has to be girls..in btw I liked your choice of a girl. You have my vote--go after her:)
ReplyDelete@Bhavana thank you ka :) will let you know about the rest of story in upcoming parts ;)
ReplyDeleteloved your comment....
nyc write up.. clearly narrated! :)
ReplyDeletesequel ? come up soon with it.
@Nandini Gargthanks nandy :) coming soon...
ReplyDeleteLOL...hilarious:P ..waiting for the next:):D
ReplyDeleteGreat start... Carry on.....
ReplyDeletehttp://debnature.blogspot.in
that was a good start for short stories.
ReplyDeleteSeems to be a real time experience? Ooglin eh?
ReplyDelete@deepak ....superb ya .......
ReplyDeleten the narration of bus conductor made me go like
" that's so trueeee".....
they are the perfect choice for the brand ambassadors of fevicol company .......do come up soon with the next part ,eagerly waiting
Looks like the buses of Chennai are nice, lot better than what we have in Patna.
ReplyDeleteI was in Chennai for three months in the summer of 2010... these MTC buses are a real lifeline. Apparently, 21H had become my favorite route: Rajaji Salai to SIPCOT IT Park. You post has made me undergo a bout of nostalgia :-P
ReplyDeletePost the next part ASAP...:)
ReplyDeleteThat's interesting .. and you finished the post on the right note, all your readers wanting to know what happens next and you said ... To Be Continued... just like in TV serials :D :P
ReplyDeleteGood going ... eagerly waiting for the next part ..
good one and funny :)
ReplyDeletemade nice read.. early to bed, early to raise...
ReplyDeleteexcellent narration......
ReplyDeleteThis was fun read, easy on the eyes and perfect for a late night read:)
ReplyDeleteAhem! Ahem! Deepak and Karthik, the story looks like real life experience.. Someone is in love???
ReplyDeleteby the way? 'Where?' ketkama vera enna conductor kepanga sir??? apparam mathematician neenga, seringa seringa..
Excellent! Inspired by real life?
ReplyDeleteSuperb, loved the story build up...
ReplyDeleteNice attempt..succeeded to some extent. Going by the rule..contact me on chat, Deepak :-)
ReplyDeleteNice write up...Get the second part posted soon!
ReplyDeleteWell begun is half done!!!
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed the Chennai "TAMIZH" - orange???is that your favourite colour????
You hooked me through out the post..
ReplyDeleteThambi..nalla ezhurithirkaaru..
Keep going!! All the wishes to write more fiction.
fun read! waiting for Part 2!!
ReplyDeletePeriya Whistle for you Machi!!..
ReplyDeleteMore than enough information i found here, thank you so much.
ReplyDeleteKaleswari Travels